Where were you?

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Colossians 3:12

Every year, on the anniversary of the tragedies of September 11th, I make my students watch a video that talks about the events of that horrible day. I also talk to them about always remembering the moments in time when others have suffered and, for this day, when the world changed forever. My students were not even born when the World Trade Center was attacked. They have heard the stories but I always worry that this event will slowly become another part of our history. Is it because it did not affect us and we were not harmed? I explain to them that, although they were not yet born, the events of 9/11 had a tremendous impact on their lives. Life changed drastically on that day and the world will be forever different. I am not talking about simple things like getting through an airport quickly or having to fill out government paperwork. I am talking about the fact that we continue to be at war against terrorists, one man does not trust another just because of his nationality, or the fact that there is tremendous evil in our world. After my students watch the video I am always pleased with the respect and concern they show. They know more about the events than I give them credit for knowing and they actually make some very smart comments. I always talk to them about placing themselves in the position of the family members of the victims of 9/11. I think we see the people and the world in a different way when we do that. Suddenly we have compassion for their loss, and although we may not totally understand, there is a part of us that feels their grief.

As I left for work early this morning, I was reminded of where I was on the morning of September 11, 2001. I had told my wife and three year old daughter goodbye for the day and had dropped my seven year old son off at his school. While driving to work, I heard the news reports as they began. First, the reporters did not understand the magnitude of what had happened and were reporting it as an accident. Soon, their tone of voice changed drastically. I remember I stopped at a gas station and went inside to watch on a TV with several other men and women. I hurried to my school and sat all day with students as we watched the events of the morning. I remember thinking about how drastically the world had changed for my children. I was also thankful that our lives had not changed as drastically as the over 3,000 people who lost their lives and the hundreds of thousands who lost friends and family.

I think our Heavenly Father expects us to feel compassion towards people whether they are a stranger or our closest friend. I know today is 18 years since the horrible tragedy that our country faced on September 11th of 2001 but don’t ever forget what people endured on that day. Also never forget that although evil is in this world and is at work every day, our God is stronger. He also makes us strong to battle the evil that may face us.

Chad

"It's just too hard"

That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.  2nd Corinthians 12:10

During the long and hot summer months of a coach’s life, we are often faced with young men who decide, for various reasons, to no longer play football. It has become so regular for me lately that I hardly listen to the excuse. I do try to find out the underlying reason for a young man’s decision and often try to change his mind, although their minds have already decided before our conversation. I remind them that at some point in their life they will be a 50 year old man and will look back over their full life and recount every decision. One of these decisions will be the one they are making while sitting in my office. They may be able to convince others that the coaches did not like them or they were being mistreated, but they will not be able to convince themselves. They will always wonder why they could not withstand the difficulty. After all, that is what makes football and life thrilling. Sure, an easy day with little to worry about is needed by many of us but we remember the difficult days and hard decisions because we either learned something about ourselves or proved something to ourselves.

Most of the young men who decide to stop playing football say things like, “I am going to concentrate on another sport or academics”. Some say they simply do not enjoy the game and want to spend their time on other activities. Some stop playing because they have met the “Love of their life”, and hope to spend every moment outside of the classroom with her. All coaches know that when it comes to coaches vs. girlfriends, the girls are undefeated. A coach has never won out over a pretty girl!

One particular young man dropped by my office a few days ago and asked if I had a few minutes to talk. I told him yes and we moved into my office to talk. I knew what the conversation would be about but asked him what he needed. He went on to tell me that he had decided to quit football. I encouraged him to think very carefully about the decision he was making and ran through my normal speech about the experiences and opportunities he would be missing over the next few years of his life. It did not seem to have any impact so I asked the young man, “Why?” I had never heard his answer before although I know it is the real reason for most young men quitting football. He said, “It’s just too hard”. I talked to him about how so many people in this world quit one thing and then it becomes very easy to quit the next difficult thing in life. People often get excited about a new activity, don’t experience immediate success, and quit just before the best part begins. Quitting becomes easy and before we know it we have lived a life of quitting during difficult moments. And we miss the opportunity to find out what we are made of and how our Heavenly Father will give us the strength to continue. I felt like I was giving a great argument but I could tell by the look on his face that he was not buying it and had already made his decision.

I am afraid his statement of, “It’s just too hard”, says much more about his personality than it does about the game of football. I believe we have found ourselves as part of a society that not only accepts quitting but continues to make it easy to quit. I pray I am wrong about this, but I am afraid that young men and women who quit because a sport is too hard will also quit in more important moments of life. What if the young girl who was the love of his life becomes hard to love? Will he quit on her? What if after the excitement of having a child wears off and the difficult moments of parenting come along, will he quit on being a father? What if he gives his life to our Heavenly Father, but it becomes too hard to live as a follower of Christ? Will he quit on his relationship with his Savior?

One of my favorite quotes comes from a speech given by President John F. Kennedy. President Kennedy stood before a huge crowd on September 12th of 1962 and spoke about our nation’s goal of landing a man on the moon and returning him safely to earth. He spoke about the people who question this goal by asking, “Why the moon when it would be much easier to reach other goals?” President Kennedy goes on to say, “We choose to go to the moon in this decade, not because it is easy, but because it is hard”.

Our Heavenly Father knows our lives will be full of difficult moments and days when we feel as though it is, “Just too hard”. He also promises to give us the strength to continue because He wants us to find out what comes at the end. The end of a playing career when we are thankful we did not quit and, most important, the end of a life lived for our Savior and an eternity spent with Him. I wish I could have convinced this young man to continue working through the hard days and trusting God to give him the strength every moment.

Chad

"Some people did some things"

“Why? What crime has he committed?” asked Pilate. But they shouted all the louder, “Crucify him!” Matthew 27:23

"Some people did some things"

This quote has made its way through the media outlets for the past few weeks and has stirred up many emotions from several different people. I do not know the lady who originally made this statement but, when I realized she was talking about the tragedy of 9/11, I was shocked by how casually she was speaking. She spoke as though it was an everyday event with little lasting consequences. I have thought about her statement for a few days and have been reminded of a few other events throughout history when some people did some things. Some people in Nazi Germany did some things and over 6 million members of the Jewish population were killed affecting the lives of millions of family members for generations. Millions of others lost their lives fighting in a World War to save countless others. Some people did some things in the past few years and their horrific actions have left a scar on the Roman Catholic faith that will possibly last forever. Their actions not only affected the victims of their crimes but have caused possibly millions of others to lose faith in their savior. At a point in the history of the United States, some people decided that one man was more deserving of the blessings and liberty our country has to offer because of the color of his skin and did some things. Those “things” caused generations of people to suffer through the racial prejudices that continue to cause a divide in our country. Toward the end of Jesus’ life on earth, He and Barabbas stood before Pilate as the Governor asked the people, “Which one do you want me to release to you: Barabbas, or Jesus who is called the Messiah?” The people, many who had witnessed Jesus’ miracles, did some things and all cried out, “Crucify Him”.

As Christians we are also called to, “Do some things.” We are called to go into the world and show our love of Jesus through our thoughts, words, and actions. We are called to pray for those in our lives, even the ones who we disagree with or consider an enemy. Even the people who, “do some things” we don’t agree with. These things we are called to do by our Heavenly Father will never make the news, we will never be known to the masses of people, and our name will not be known all over the world. However, the impact of the simple things we can do will last forever and will have eternal consequences for the many people we interact with each day. As a coach, I can pray daily for the young men who have been placed under my care. I can pray for their health as they play a crazy game but, more importantly, I can pray for their eternal salvation. I can pray for their lives to be forever changed by the saving grace of our Heavenly Father. No one will ever know the words I speak on behalf of these young men, but God is faithful to answer my prayers.

I believe God is calling all believers to also do some things. Not the kind of things that make the news or will be remembered throughout history, but the kind of things that will change a person’s life for eternity.


Let’s do some-thing!

Chad

"Standing in the fire but never feeling the heat"

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds,

James 1:2

The past year of my life has been full of many first time experiences. After taking a position as a head football coach my life suddenly turned upside down with hiring a staff, meeting a new team, being presented with everyone’s list of problems, not knowing how to fix many of them, and several others I cannot list. It has been quite an experience so far and I am even more thankful for the many men I have worked for in the coaching profession who taught me by their example. Each day has brought it’s individual problems, needs, and concerns. Along with taking on the responsibility of being the head coach of a new team, my wife and I decided it would be a good time to begin the renovation of and the addition to a new house. We have spent the past year in a temporary house with our dresser in the dining room, boxes of items for the new house scattered throughout, and clothes jammed into closets and piled on spare beds. My wife has done an amazing job of coordinating the construction and making the difficult decisions about the house, all while I was away at work. Needless to say we are ready to finally settle into our new home in a few weeks and get our lives back in order. At least the amount of order a coaching family can expect. It has been a year of having to constantly focus on several issues at once and make the correct decision about each. We also continue to remind each other of how blessed we are to have lives that are filled with young people, new friends, and new and old challenges. We are also blessed to get to go through all this excitement together.

I was in church yesterday and I heard someone say, “Standing in the fire but never feeling the heat”. When I heard these words I thought about the past year my wife and I have spent together. A year full of blessings mixed in with challenges that forced us to step outside of our comfort zone. A year full of days filled with emotional ups and downs only to be reminded of our Heavenly Father who is ever present through the ups and the downs.

I know in my life, and I am sure in yours also, we become so discouraged by the flames that we forget our Heavenly Father is always walking before us, protecting us from the heat. After all, the flames of a fire are beautiful, when you are a safe distance away, but the heat is what pushes us away and keeps us from going further.

My prayer today was for God to give me the courage to not run from the flames and the faith to trust him to protect me from the heat.

Chad

What's your excuse?

For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.  Romans 1:20

As a coach, you are in a unique position to spend your days with many of the best young people in the world. I get to be around them when they are still young enough to have the innocence of youth but are mature enough to have many great plans for their futures and unique views of the world in which they live. I am able to form a bond of trust that does not exist outside of the relationship between a coach and a player. But, there is always a young man on every team who does not respond to any of the coaches and continues to make bad decisions. Every coach can probably immediately think of the young person who they feel like they failed to connect with and worry about this young person’s future. I know there are a few in my twenty-six years of coaching.

Throughout this past season there was one particular young man who never seemed to respond to any of our coaches. It was a daily struggle to have him act appropriately, behave in class, and follow instructions. I felt like I would wake up each day and wait on the next bad report from another coach, administrator, or teacher. This particular young man has had several unfortunate and sad situations occur throughout his life. When I first heard this young man’s name, I continued to hear the same story of his childhood from former teachers and coaches. As a very small child he had witnessed the death of his mother but fortunately was too young to remember the details. From everything else I could learn about this young man, he lived with relatives who cared for him and wanted the best for him. I am sure he had many difficulties in his life but had also been given a chance for success if he will just take advantage of the blessings and learn from the negative. What stood out to me was the way many adults excused away each moment of bad behavior because of an event that occurred when this young man was very young. Each time his name would be mentioned in a conversation someone would remind me of this story. I am blessed to not only have the world’s best mother but I have spent my life with people who want the best for me and expect the best from me. One of my many prayers as a coach is to ask God to give me some insight into how to treat and respond to a young person who has had a much different life than me. It has bothered me that so many people allow a terrible event that happened many years ago to be his excuse.

The young man I am writing about has recently left the school where I work and moved to another school. I worry that the story will be told over and over again and his behavior will be excused away, over and over again. I hate for anyone, especially a young person to have so many challenges in his or her life. We all have challenges and many of us have challenges that we must deal with on a daily basis. How we allow those challenges to shape our lives makes all the difference.

For the past few weeks the eighth grade football players have been coming to the high school in the afternoon to lift weights with the varsity coaches. As they were leaving a few days ago one of these boys asked me if I knew the young man I have written about. I told him I did know him and hated that he was leaving our school. What he said to me next was interesting and something I have thought about since our conversation. He said, “Coach, he is my cousin and I hope he does not get into trouble at his new school. I am so tired of people using what happened to him as an excuse”. I was already thinking what a mature young man this thirteen year old must be and then he said, “My mother left me at the hospital the day after I was born and I have not seen her since but that is not going to change my life. I know one day when I have made it in life, she will show back up but it will be too late then”.

After he left for the day I began thinking about what he had told me and his reaction to his life’s challenge. Both boys have been greatly disappointed but the way they allow this challenge to shape their lives is drastically different. Both have missed out on a relationship with a loving mother who they know they can depend upon. Both have days when they wonder why the person who gave birth to them is no longer in their life. But one allows the challenge to be an excuse that so many accept as a good reason for poor behavior and bad choices. The other uses the challenge as a driving force to succeed in life, in his future career, and the way he treats others in his life. I have no doubt that this young man will be a success in his life regardless of the size of his bank account. He will one day have his own children who he will raise in a loving home. His mother may show up again one day and she will be the one who has missed out on spending her life with a young man of character in spite of the challenge she created for him many years earlier. I hope they are able to form a relationship but it will never be what it could and should have been.

It seems as though we live in a world of excuses. We could all blame bad parents, lack of money, or bad teachers for our lack of success in life. In recent years we have even heard the excuse of affluence. Someone actually had so much good in their life that they did not know the difference in right and wrong. I believe God places these challenges before us and expects us to use these obstacles to learn more about His love for us and to show others how we trust in Him through these challenges. These challenges can be our excuse for poor behavior or bad decisions or they can also be our excuse for succeeding in life and demonstrating God’s love for us even while facing our challenges each day. So far, one of the young men uses his challenge as an excuse for failure but the other sees his challenge as his excuse for success. So, what’s your excuse?

Chad